
– by B. T. Newberg
Marriage is hard. Zeus and Hera were constantly bickering. Inanna banished her husband Dumuzi to the underworld. Skadi and Njord couldn’t live together no matter how they tried. Are all marriages doomed to failure?
Humanistic Paganism bills itself as a naturalistic “marriage” of science and myth. It would be nice if it were a neat, sweet, picket-fence relationship. But that’s not how most marriages go, is it? Marriage is hard work, but it’s worth it.
This metaphor is particularly poignant to me since I’m two and a half months into a marriage of my own. The honeymoon phase is over. No one said marriage would be easy, whether it’s between two people or two cultural phenomena like science and myth.
By science I mean that modern method of empirical investigation which has given us everything from toasters to quantum physics, and which takes naturalism as a working principle. By myth I mean the ancient stories that have given us the likes of Zeus, Thor, and the Morrígan, as well as the rituals, meditations, and other practices that go along with a living tradition of mythology.
Now that we know what we mean by science and myth, what does it take to make their marriage work?
No marriage has much hope if the couple can’t learn to listen to each other.
It takes courage to hear hard criticism. Science and myth have plenty of grievances, so they’d better find a way to air them in a safe space. HP aspires to be just such a safe space.
It also takes patience. We aren’t necessarily able to express our feelings coherently or all at once. Each person must discover themselves in the process, while the other waits patiently for them to work out their issues. On HP, we have folks more science-oriented and folks more myth-oriented, and both need the patience to let the other speak their truth.
Finally, it takes responsiveness. It’s not enough just to listen, you also have to be willing to be persuaded. On HP, we’ve been challenged by critical voices, and we have to recognize the value of that process. Likewise, critics need to be open to having their challenges met.
As with couples counseling, we must find the courage and patience to talk through the tough issues, and the willingness to let the process change us.
It also takes creativity to make a marriage work.
Remember that old movie The Parent Trap? Two teenage twins conspire to get their divorced parents back together. Their cutesy antics may make you laugh or vomit, depending on your taste, but the point is they use creativity to re-ignite love.
Theology is a lot like that. A recent term in religious studies is creative misunderstanding, whereby a tradition changes by re-interpreting the old in a new way. This enables a community to meet the needs of the present while maintaining continuity with the past.
It may take some creative misunderstanding to keep science and myth together. Like the twins in The Parent Trap, we may need ingenuity to rekindle their flame.
Gary Chapman has a book for couples called The Five Love Languages, which proposes you have to learn how the other expresses love, and learn to speak that language yourself. Science and myth speak different languages, and they may need to learn the other’s in order to communicate.
HP is about learning to speak the languages of both science and myth. Michael Dowd frames these in terms of day language and night language, respectively. Science speaks of reality in the clear light of day. Myth also speaks of reality, but in the strange imagery of dreams in the night. Both have important things to say, and it takes learning the other’s language to achieve understanding.
Often the best love-making is after a fight. When couples kiss and make up, they re-affirm they’d rather be together than apart, despite their differences.
Science and myth have had a rocky relationship, and currently stand facing away from each other with crossed arms. Can HP turn them toward each other again?
If so, we’re looking forward to an awesome make-up.
It’ll be like Psyche and Eros, or Isis after finally recovering her lost husband Osiris.

Myth and science married – is this union doomed to go the way of the Kardashians? B. T. Newberg reflects on what it takes to make this marriage work.
Saving the marriage of science and myth, by B. T. Newberg
Appearing Sunday, December 11th, on Humanistic Paganism.
This will be our final Thing on Thursday. We’ll conclude by asking: What have you valued most from Humanistic Paganism?
Join us for the next council on matters vital to the future of Humanistic Paganism.
The conversation continues this Thursday, December 15th, on Humanistic Paganism.
Introducing a new ebook from B. T. Newberg! This collection of creative nonfiction stories set in Malaysia has already received a glowing review from Southeast Asia Travel Advice. We’ll bring you the inside scoop on this exciting new ebook on sale now at GoodReads!
Love and the Ghosts of Mount Kinabalu, by B. T. Newberg
Appearing Sunday, December 18th, on Humanistic Paganism.

Drew takes a break from his travels in Thailand to review our first ebook, Encounters in Nature. An e-reader friendly version is now on sale at GoodReads, but you can get your copy FREE! To find out how, click here.
Encounters in Nature: An ebook review, by Drew Jacob
Appearing Sunday, December 18th, on Humanistic Paganism.
The big event is just around the corner! You’re gonna love these winter interviews of big-name authors!
Starts on the Solstice, December 21st.
Existential Paganism, by Ian Edwards
Thing on Thursday #11
Developing meditations and rituals was voted as a potential project for us, now let’s get more detail on what that means. Last week we asked about meditation, so this week let’s talk about ritual.
The choices in the poll may involve some overlap, and there will no doubt be plenty left out. Please use the “other” box for any missing types you wish to vote for.
There may also be considerable overlap between “ritual” and “meditation”, the boundaries between which may be blurry or ultimately non-existent.
Please choose your top three.
Please share your thoughts in the comments below!
This post is part of a series of councils on matters vital to the future. The name represents both the generic term for, you know, a thingie, as well as the Old Norse term for a council of elders: a Thing.Each week until the Winter Solstice, Thing on Thursday will explore a new controversy. Participation is open to all – the more minds that come together, the better. Those who have been vocal in the comments are as welcome as those quiet-but-devoted readers who have yet to venture a word. We value all constructive opinions.
There are only a few rules:
Comments will be taken into consideration as we determine the new direction of Humanistic Paganism. This will also greatly shape the vision that unfolds in our upcoming ebook Our Ancient Future: Visions of Humanistic Paganism.
So please make your voice heard in the comments!
Ian Edwards is not naturalistic, but this week he explores what those who follow such paths contribute to the Pagan community.
Most followers of Paganism follow it as their preferred way to connect with the Divine. However there are a significant number who, although they do not believe in Divinity either as a single force or a particular pantheon, still find that Paganism is an important part of their personality and day to day life. They tend to base their beliefs on science, Jungian psychology, and the latest findings in neuropsychology and neuropsychiatry.
Interestingly, most of the practitioners of this branch of Paganism still believe in magick. Usually this is based on synchronicity as encountered by Jung, and commented on in his case notes and autobiography and backed up by practical experience.
One Pagan I know who follows this path first became interested in it when he read Scott Adams’ The Dilbert Future, in which Scott, an atheist and trained hypnotist, mentions experimenting with both affirmations (successfully) and having an experienced Tarot reader predict the order of Tarot cards drawn randomly from the pack whilst in a trance.
My acquaintance tried some similar experiments, particularly with the affirmations, and got good results. Following on from this, he looked for a system that would explain why this sort of thing worked. After a brief flirtation with Chaos Magick he realised that Paganism was the path most in tune with his psychology and his love of nature.
Instead of the Divine, he works successfully with the inner Archetypes as described by Jung. He certainly gets the results he wants with his magick and, over all, is a pleasant person to be with, and respects all living things.
The latter to the extent that he is vegetarian, believing that as there is no afterlife it is particularly cruel to deprive an animal of its life – and subject it to a potentially unkind lifestyle when growing up – purely so he can eat it. He doesn’t even wear animal sourced items such as leather and is the only person other than myself I know of to help worms out of puddles so they don’t drown.
He isn’t alone. Even my friend, a Witch whose Pagan shop I helped out at back in the 80’s and 90’s, is an existentialist Pagan. Because she had no particular ties to any of the many spiritual paths that people who visited her shop followed, she was respected by all as a neutral party. Her magick too was based on synchronicity and she was a skilled Tarot counselor.
The shop was a magnet for Pagans of all persuasions and prospered, only closing when the building it was based in closed down. Rather than continue in a new shop my friend became a fine arts teacher and still follows a Pagan path.
Personally I have learned a lot from my existential friends and atheists such as Jonathan Miller, mainly because they make you think.
I’ll always remember seeing Miller on “The Late Show” hosted by Gay Burne sometime in the early 1990’s carving very large holes in the arguments of an invited audience of various spiritual persuasions. They were saying things such as “Of course there’s life after death – look at all the people who’ve come back to life after dying on the operating table and told us their experiences”. To which Miller pointed out “How do you know they just didn’t die, and the hypoxia and natural endorphins released by the body just gave the illusion of an afterlife?”
Then they mentioned reincarnation and people remembering past lives. Millers’ response was to explain how much a person’s personality depends on their biology. Different biology = a different personality, and therefore a different person. Thus, the personality could not survive death.
His arguments were so good I rang up a couple of fellow Pagans while the program was on and suggested they watch it too. “This is the sort of thing we should be looking into” I said. “Also if near death experiences and reincarnation are real, these are the sort of facts we should be able to explain to show our side of the debate with equal clarity and evidence”
What I liked was the way Miller was showing up the gaps in the reasoning and knowledge of the people he was debating with rather than disputing the existence of the Divine.
This is exactly the sort of reasoning that makes existential Pagans such a vital part of the Pagan community as a whole – they encourage critical thinking rather than just blindly accepting dogma. It’s the Pagan equivalent of the Buddhist Kalama Sutta on discerning religious teachings
My being comfortable in discussing Paganism from the existentialist viewpoint has always drawn comment from my more traditional Pagan friends. “You’ve had personal encounters with different Gods and Goddesses, and even channeled them on occasion.” They say “How can you take someone seriously who doesn’t believe they exist?!”
My reply is that there is a lot more to the Divine than the limited view that many people have of it, and by looking into the existentialist worldview and dialoguing with them, both sides learn a lot more about nature, the foundations of the multiverse, and our place in it.
First published at BellaOnline.

Ian Edwards
Ian Edwards is the Pagan editor for the on-line magazine “Bellaonline”. He has been practising magick since he lived in Mexico in 1979, and following the Pagan path since the mid 1980s. Ian spent most of his early life travelling as his father was first in the British Royal Navy and later part of the British Embassy staff in various parts of the world.
During his travels he saw and learned about the indigenous spiritual paths of many countries and also trained in several martial arts with strong psycho/spiritual roots including Aikido, Fung Sau Kung Fu, and Ninjutsu. He is a third degree black belt in the latter which he was presented with by the Grandmaster of the Bujinkan system after studying the art in Japan.
He also helped out at a Pagan shop called “Broomsticks” in his natal city of Portsmouth (UK) run buy an existentialist Pagan. Ian learned a lot about that path in addition to appreciating the many different spiritual systems that used the shop for supplies and discussing esoteric matters.
He is the author of The Wizard’s Way to Wealth published by Cappel Bann Publishers.

Ian Edwards is not naturalistic, but he explores what those who follow such paths contribute to the Pagan community.
Existential Paganism, by Ian Edwards
Appearing Sunday, December 4th, on Humanistic Paganism.
Last week we asked about the meaning of meditation. This week, we ask, what does ritual mean to you?
Join us for the next council on matters vital to the future of Humanistic Paganism.
The conversation continues this Thursday, December 8th, on Humanistic Paganism.

Myth and science married – is this union doomed to go the way of the Kardashians? B. T. Newberg reflects on what it takes to make this marriage work.
Saving the marriage of science and myth, by B. T. Newberg
Appearing Sunday, December 11th, on Humanistic Paganism.
Naturalistic meaning and purpose, by Jon Cleland Host